Who would have ever guessed that you would learn your first naughty word from Mommy? I've been lecturing your dad for two years that he should start modifying his language in preparation for little ears. As it turns out, it was I who needed the lecturing.
Here's how it happened. Daddy was out of town. It was just you and me, which means that Mommy was probably on the "worn out" side. I placed you on the changing table so that I could give you a fresh diaper. You were being your usual squirmy self - anything left on the dresser is vulnerable to being kicked or knocked off. This isn't usually a problem, because most of the time, what's on your dresser is plush or plastic (like your animals or your comb). This time, though, it was a sizeable bottle of lotion.
With a wave of your arm, the lotion container went crashing to the flower ending with a big splat! Lotion was everywhere! "Oh shit," I said. "It's broken." Not dwelling on the mishap (yours or mine), I finished changing your diaper, and then proceeded with the cleanup. We went on with the day.
Later that day, it was time for another diaper change. I took you back to your room and placed you on the dresser. You noticed the broken lotion bottle still on the dresser, and then turned to me and said with all innocence, "Shit. Boken." I asked you, uncertain I heard you correctly, "What did you say?" You repeated, "Shit. Boken."
And if that wasn't confirmation enough for me, two days later, when I was changing your clothes, you said it again after accidentally dropping your shoes on to the floor: "Oh shit."
I can hardly believe that it was me who taught you a bad word. Of course you don't know that it's a bad word, but everyone else will know, when your repeat it in public, that someone taught you a bad word. Everyone will suspect your Daddy, but he will be free of blame and point his finger squarely at me.
Your Imperfect but Loving Mommy